how did things turned out to be like this?
i could still remember the times when we were together vividly. how the both of you decorated our new house tgt, painting the doors and constructing tables for us.
i wonder how long has it been since we last went overseas tgt.
i wonder if you still rmb the happy moments we had tgt.
why be tgt in the first place? why give life to us if you were to view us as your burden, your responsibilities?
to me, i feel that there were no longer bonds, but only responsibilities. wat hold us tgt now are just the guilt and the thought of repaying each other. we barely talked. the same thing happened each and everyday.
i do hope to be able to share by thoughts and feelings with you just like the others. but i guess perhaps we are not that close to be bothered by wat each other is thinking now.
why did this happen to me? or rather, to you? why are you so stubborn?
not too long ago i still hold the hope that we can still be tgt, and that everything could be solved. you just need to be more understanding and open minded to each other, and rmb the reason why you are tgt in the first place. i still hoped for the chance that you might rekindle the love for each other.
but years after years, it just does not work that way, but in fact the opposite. why be so obstinate? you are all adults. wat's your problem?
watever it is, i dun feel like caring anymore. i do not want to have any feelings for this anymore. i know love cannot be forced upon on you and wish for you to stay on tgt just for our sake. just leave. talk out everything and settle it once and for all. i do not want to care wat will happen to us in the future, but as for now, pls stop this tug-o-war. it's tiring. i hate to be your messenger for all these year. you are a freaking adult, just pick up your courage and reach a conclusion, so that we can make our relationships clearer, and less awkward.
dun worry abt me, i will find my way to live on. if not, just dont. as simple as that. since this thought has been haunting me for quite a while alrd. the reason that i am still here, is just because of my stubbornness and sheer determination.
at least i had something to thank you for - the environment that i was brought up in made me feel less hurt if the worse outcome happens, and also perhaps in other situations where this will come in handy.